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One Season at a time...
09.30.04 (8:25 pm)   [edit]
Ok, another movie recomendation. This time it's a Korean movie titled, "Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter, and Spring. It's simply a deep buddhist fable by the Korean director Kim ki-duk.
from the back of the jacket.
" A tiny Buddhist monastary floats on a raft amidst breathtaking landscape, tended by a solitary monk. Into this serene setting comes a young child, who will become the Old Monk's protege... and so begins a lifelong journey of hope, despair passion and redemption. From the brash actions of youth, through the dawn of adolescence and the fullness of adulthood, one man's lessons are learned as seasons pass, his emotional inner life changing as the landscape around him. Lushly exotic yet universal story about the human spirit and it's evolution from innocence to love, evil to enlightment, and ultimately to rebirth."
 
I was in India with them.
09.29.04 (1:37 pm)   [edit]
If you have the chance to see the MOvie "Mr. and Mrs. Iyer." do see it. It's an Indian movie not released in the US, but you can find it in those rare hard to find places.

If you like to travel, watch this. One of the best movies I've seen in a long time. It's about people who pass through our lives at the time when we need them the most... and how we can save one another in a time of choas. Beautifully done... I forgot about my surroundings while watching this movie. I was in India with them... but this movie is relevant to anyplace in this time.
 
No more clutter
09.29.04 (1:29 pm)   [edit]
Woke up this morning and the hurricane winds were blowing outside my house. Yesterday the rain formed rivers in Brooklyn and today I'm back on Long Island listening to the wind howel through the oak trees. I've been back and forth moving my stuff, I don't have much, cause I sold most of it before i left for Spain, i sold my car and all my furniture. It's refreshing not having a lot of "stuff". I used to be a collecter... but have simplified my life removing all the clutter I don't need...even though it's still hard sometimes to put my clothes in their proper place.

so... I have a part time job starting in October; teaching... in K town in New York to FIT students mostly from Korea, Japan and Tawain, a few scattered from Eastern Europe and Russia. Kinda cool since most of them will come from Art backgrounds like me. I still need to find a day job... maybe tutor on the side or get one of those bullshit jobs for now like in a cafe. My sister's going to give me all the design programs to put on my roomates computer, i wouldn't mind freelancing... but can't stand the idea of working in office or feeling obligated to a company... I still have ideas about traveling next year... but not for as long as last time.

Anyways... I feel like I'll find a good job match this time working in New York. Things seem to be falling into place... slowly, not so fast paced like this city can be... but that's alright... everythings kind of temporary anyway...

Speaking of jobs... I went to my first place of Empolyment in New York on Monday. Broadway in SoHo... now a Bloomingdales... once Canal Jean Company. My sister and I used to shop there when were teenyboopers roaming around in New York. It was one of those landmark stores... now it's a polished Bloomingdales for the uppercrust crowd. gone is the basement of Army navy stuff and the studio office I worked in... now there's all these chain stores everywhere. Big fuckn corporations. America is one huge fucking Corporation! That's why we need to expand into other countries... and drive the smaller ones out of power so we can build one big empire! And together we can rule the world like McDonalds and Starbucks! even 711 has joined in on the alliance! I can't wait to watch the debates this thursday, unscripted!
 
I'm in love...
09.28.04 (9:16 am)   [edit]
with life at the moment... gotcha ya... and it's got a hold on me.

 
Bye Bye Beantown...
09.28.04 (4:57 am)   [edit]
hahahahaha! the Yankees lost against the Red Sox twice! 12-5 what a horrendous score!
I was in New England when it happened; Maine to be exact eating seafood at a microbrewery. I was wearing a Brooklyn sweatshirt and suddenly felt like I shold cover it up in this neck of the woods. There was a group of roudy butch women banging on their tables chanting for the Red Sox...frightning! Don't even mention your from New York here, yikes! I don't even care about baseball, but it's always funny when the Yankees and Red Sox play.
We went up to boston one last time before my sister makes here move to New York City. good times in Boston... bye bye Beantown with my sister living in it.
 
Where'sa fucking Starbuck's when you need one?
09.23.04 (8:07 pm)   [edit]
i just watched that movie the "Garden State" while I know it's a girl movie, I just so happen to be a girl but it happens to be written by a boy and the main character is a boy.

We drove through a town on the South Shore looking at least five times for a place to have coffee before the movie started. Where's a fucking starbuck when you need one? We found a diner which closed at 10pm.

We got to the theatre interrupted a couple in a make out session. It was the same couple we'd seen at 711 whom we asked for directions to the theatre... perhaps we planted the idea in their heads.

My friend asked the candy counter boy what the movie was about and he said "nothing". I guess cause there's no big explosions or police chases. Whay would you want to watch a movie about nothing?

For me It was a movie that hit home. about love, loss and Life and finding a "Home". rarrr! i need a hug.

We drove back to my "childhood" home in the "Empire State" through patches of fog and dark farm fields. I'm supposed to be home but I wonder when I'll find my home...
 
Eastern time
09.21.04 (5:18 am)   [edit]
In my absence from the blog scene, here's what you have our haven't missed. I haven't felt like sharing my writing in the past weeks or so. I guess it's kind of like teaching. a giving of yourself, where sometimes you feel you get something in return or that you've reached people but your not sure how and you get exhasted, sharing yourself. Sound selfish doesn't. I guess I just want to know more of what my friends are doing, more then an email 2 sentences long. plus I tend to edit these pieces for some of the people who read them. please excuse this work in progress...

during my trip I wanted to share every inspiring moment, (exception of the xxx) , now I'm figuring out what to do in my next path in life, a job in my OWN country, it's more difficult to find one here! the job search sucks. it involves lot's of wating, lot's of searching on websites, and all that other boring stuff you guys know well. @#*^(!

I feel I made a good decision moving back to New York and to put my nomad shoes away for awhile, although I still think it's in my blood. But for now I've been moving some of my things into my new place in Brooklyn I'll be sharing with a good friend. I can't believe how excited I am to hang a simple picture on the wall, simple things like that make me happy now! ... and being able to call my family without paying 10 dollars a call.... and my sister moving to New York!!! I haven't lived in the same city as her in 8 years! I can be a twin again. something I tend to forget I am. only this time we are individuals and not clumped together without first names. Also to have people around me that I don't constantly have to say goodbye, "when will I ever see you again?" People stable in my life instead of passing through... it feels good. Goodbyes's became second nature to me, in a shortlived meeting. maybe I secretly Iike goodbyes, a longing, a nostalgia for one of those perfect days, one of those brief meetings, right when you need them, that is something beautiful about life. I like reflecting on memories. It can be a bit annoying sometimes though!

I was watching a movie the other night and one of the actors said something my father liked. "Life is like preparing for one big long goodbye." hmmmmmmm... "once you have a taste of divine in you can you face your fears" hmmmmm.

The other weekend I met up with some of my old college friends. People I used to party with back in the day, dance the night away with while our friend spinned feel good old skool music which makes anybody want to shake thier groove thang. It was funny to see them after a few years had passed. one kid with shaggy hair now was sporting a shaved monk look, and another kid once sporting a buzzcut now had shaggy long hair shaved in the back which he wore in a samurai bun! hahahahA!
funny stuff, to see these people again.

ohhhh, I need a job soon cause, I'm getting all nostalgic and sad today. the music I'm listening to doesn't help either. Music in me triggers memories more vividly then any of the other senses! But I'm happy with what I've done in my life thus so far. 2 years seemed like a long time when I was going through them living overseas 12 hours ahead of Eastern time. feeling so far away, missing holidays and celebrating them with other transients, expats and alien residents. I was an alien. ha! I had to give my card back when i left Korea. I liked being a foreigner, we'd seek each other out, it became a sort of game.

I dont' think I've ever felt more Isolated in my life then that spring in Seoul. But it's amazing what you can overcome in a short amount of time, when you ride it out ... let things take their natural course. and my reward for this was my solo trip around Asia. a place I've wanted to explore for a looooong time. And I did all on my own. fuckn A! I never thought I could do anything like that!
(god this is getting sappy) but this is how i feel now... and I hate fall because it's the end of summer!

Anyways, I'm finished with my sappy nostalgic rambling. share some stories with me...
 
a New York Siting...
09.10.04 (1:46 pm)   [edit]
I saw Pavoratti (Sp?) today while walking near central park. He was sitting in a parked car signing a record for someone. he didn't look real, but it was fo real!

THen I saw a group of men sitting in the back of a truck brown bagging it squatter style in a truck for storage space. I laughed and smiled down the street. PAVORATTI!!! yahahahahahahaa~! I love random celebrity sitings...
 
40 oz to freedom!
09.08.04 (7:33 pm)   [edit]
So I've got to retitle this blog, I'm no longer hot on the SE Asian trail instead I'm sitting here in limbo. It's raining on Long Island. I can hear the wind and the rain outside falling on the leaves in the woods. It's quiet here except for the crickets, and my mother sewing on her sewing machine and my dad sitting on the L shaped sofa with the cushion indented just for him reading outloud about the Brookyn Musuem of art. ahhhhhh now i've got some music. and everyone has gone to bed. I'm going stir crazy! Thank god I'm getting into the city this weekend. I feel so faaaaaaaaaaaar away from everything.

i hate watching the news here. Everything feels so insular. Everything is about America. I'm sick of hearing about murder and all this stupid political bashing. my brain is going to mush. who the hell cares about Paris Hilton who just wrote a book about how f'ckn rich she is! i try not to watch. I try to keep my mind occupied. but there's no one to talk to out here except my lil cats. god i hope I don't become one of those cat ladies... but...

I'm Stepping back... stepping back, a new step.
I'm stepping back. over the bridge with a foreign friend.
crossing the dirty water.
enter into smog and my freedom.
into a new paranioa.
stepping back onto the diamonds and bling bling.
back to the pumping sounds and the arteries of something new.
new blood. headspins and robot steps.
white and black rubber bouncing on the pavement.
burst! boom! cha ching!
color here and there that other people hate and some people love.
I love it.
pulse. ba boom! flash.
sound systems.
and bounce bounce bounce!
everythings got that bounce.
freestyle wicka wicka wick wack!
creeping and crawling something new on it's way.
ready for anything.
it's gonna creep on you.
in a stretched limo.
coming down the avenue.
I can't see anything.
there are too many flashes.
it's too bright.
too tall.
too much.
but you can see a single solitary light in the sky.
and dotted lights branching from the body.
you start swaying cause it's infectious...

the heart.

When I went to New York City for the first time since I've been back, i forgot how loud it is. Sirens and horns... more so with the RNC. Look at what happens when the republicans come to town! Helicopters contantly hovering over the rooftops of skyscrapers shining searchlights into our privacy. I haven't seen that many since 9/11. And an NYPD blimp! I used to see them over baseball stadiums now they're used to prevent "terrorist acts" blahhhhh.

I did some touristy things with my English friend in town. Like the Empire State building, a place I haven't been up since I was a kid. My friend and I watched the sunset from the top and watched the lights sprinkle on after dark. and the traffic form gridlocks. we watched the stream of red breaklights and whites headlights and the constant hum of traffic. It was awesome to see at night. We even witnessed a bike protest in relation to the RNC. People cheering and cops in the front and back of the protest. Cool to see from the top of the Empire State building!

I felt like a traveler in my own city. It was a cool feeling. I listened to all the different languages on top of the Empire State building, a destination for many, and had a moment of vertigo. and a flashback of a nightmare i had of the Empire State building swaying from an explosion. I didn't think I expierenced any repercussions or anything until i saw a few planes which seemed dangerously close... I know, I know it's my own paranoia.

The night moved on in New York city and we ran around and introduced my English friend to 40 oz's of Budwieser. He had never seen them before so we bought 2 after drinking cheap mexican TEcante and American Pabst beer. yeah represent!! i felt like I was in High shcool again.

We taxied it back to Brooklyn sat on the roof Thinking we could watch the sunrise but retired early when the sleepy drunk syndrom set in.

The Next day I ventured over to PS-1 in Queens which is an art musuem affiliated with the MOMA. Every summer on Saturdays PS-1 has djs spinning music and one of the only outdoor areas you can dance at in New York city. It's a huge space. You can drink if you wish, dance if you wish, view art if you wish, stand in a makeshift bamboo forest with rain if you wish, lounge on a hammock if you wish, or sit in the sand if you wish, but you can't stand in the security gaurds way or they'll tell you quite bluntly to move out of the way~! and you can do this all in Queens! Queens?

The exhibits were cool. There was a video installation of three different people on 3 huge screens and 3 other blank transparent screens where you view the audience watching them and you could sit in the middle in a cirlce sofa watching all of this. At first you think the audience is the piece but then you enter into the center and there's more... it's hard to explain but it was cool.

So the music was pumping some good stuff. breakbeats, and people were dancing robot style, and elevated subways were passing and a huge murial of graffiti was on display... it was one of those Urban New York Scenes... Yeah yeah cheesy, but I haven't seen stuff like this in a long time, and it was cool to show off this city to someone whoes never been. who want's to come visit?!
 
the significance of insignificance
09.05.04 (7:09 pm)   [edit]
Not sure what to title this one...
It's labor day weekend and it's insignifigant to me. I'm not working. It's midnight. I've just spent the last hour reading my journal entries from my trip. It's funny to read them now... I've been sitting still at home. regrouping... getting ready for a move. getting ready to have a home again.
some of my travel friends have just logged into MSN halfway on the other side of the world. working on a monday... while it's Labor day early morning here. people I'm not sure when I'll see again,
(man my spelling is shit!)
 
Long Island wildn' styln'
09.04.04 (8:24 am)   [edit]
I've just been writing a bit since i've been back and have the time to.

I'm sitting in a cat urine smelling room listening to a group called "Cat Power" in the house I grew up writing this far from the places I've been in life. Not exactly the most inspiring of places, but I guess you could say it's where it all began... This place on the Eastern end of Long Island where only 2 Jewish people in the land of JAPpy girls (Jewish American princess)seem to exsist, and rolling farmland still prevails... and the sight of Manhattanites claiming to be the first to find the new "it" place other then the Hamptons divided by a fork to the north. I am neither a Jewish princess or a farmgirl or an urban sophisticate or your typical American girl... who am I? I wonder as do many people... these are some of the pieces that make up the intricate life of a girl who wished she lived in the time of great exploration!

Having grown up on Long Island many people who are not from here often like to joke about our accents. "Oh my gawd, your from LawnG Island, hahaha!!" ...However we lived closer to New England then we did to New York City and our accents this far east resembled those across the Long Island Sound (whatever they are). The area we lived had less of the thick accent but you still had to drive through the "Oh My GAWD!" stripmall suburbs part of Long Island to get to the metropolis of Manhattan. yuck... hated the middle of Long Island, and it is a Looooong Island that may one day erode into the Atlantic cause it's a sandbar! And the homes in the Hamptons will be the first to go! hahaaaaa!